I don’t have kids, and I wouldn’t know what to do with them if I did.
I suppose it could happen someday, in the distant future, when I’m actually a grown-up. I can’t really imagine it now. I could vaguely muse on all the wonderful ways I’d be sure to raise my offspring to be kind and happy and curious and functional and diligent and marvellous, but I’d probably end up far too tired to do any of that.
But there’s a few things I can think of which I’d wish for my unlikely future children.
I’d want to read a big, bright, colourful, fascinating book of science with them from a young age, and hopefully show them Cosmos a little further along.
I’d like them to be able to make creative use of advancing technologies in ways that I can’t keep up with.
I’d do my best to instill in them a universal respect for other people and a healthy disrespect for authority.
And I fervently hope that they look back on the historic idea of treating same-sex affection and partnership as being inferior to its opposite-sex counterpart with bewilderment and alienation.
It’s the year 2011, and news stories are still circulating about politicians wanting to ban gay kissing on TV before the 9pm watershed.
Normal kissing is fine, of course. And there’s no problem with murders at any time of day, so long as there’s not too much blood.
But children need to be “protected”, after all. Some things just aren’t “appropriate”. Letting gay people get all gay is just so “sexually suggestive“.
In fact, David Cameron has recently denied having any such plans to introduce this particular legislation. But it’s sadly all too plausible, and it’s not the only similar instance of its kind. Tennessee is currently facing a potential state law which would forbid teachers from discussing or even mentioning homosexuality with students. Hetero is the only type of sex that can be talked about prior to ninth grade.
I don’t have kids, and don’t have plans to. But if I ever do, I hope they find this whole debate impossible to understand.